Comments on Chapters 19 to 21 (Part 6- Transforming My Experience)

Comments on Chapters 19 to 21 (Part 6- Transforming My Experience)


from John Ortberg's The Me I Want to Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You



1. "Your work is a huge part of God's plan for your life, and God intends the Spirit to fill and engerize workplaces. Work that gets done in offices and elsewhere (ie- family, church, community groups, etc)- building up people , creating teams, managing the resources of creation- desperately requires the guidance and energy of the Spirit." page 219. Please comment on that statement.

Also- do you see "work" as a 9 to 5 reality; something you get paid for or do you view "work" as part of the fabric of living.



2. Have you ever thought of work as "spiritual"? Chapter 19 speaks about using our strengths. Do you know your strengths?



3. Can you think of circumstances/situations in life when you have helped other people use their gifts and talents thus helping then get more "in the flow". (see page 222)



4. I love the story at the beginning of chapter 20 where William Zinsser was frustrated with having to write obituaries. He lamented to his editor, "when am I going to get some decent story assignments?" The response-- "nothing you write will ever get read as carefully as what you are righting right now!" Indeed, it was a reminder that we are called to do our very best with what is in front of us. have you ever been in a situation like Zinsser where you spoke out in frustration but. . . what was needed was "your best"!



5. Chapter 20 summarizes the book "Habits of the Heart" by Robert Bellah. It's a classic. Bellah described 3 attitudes toward work:

a. treat it as job to pay bills and make money

b. approach as career

c. approach work as a calling.



where are you right now in your "attitude toward work"? Have you experienced change in attitude over the years? How so?



6. "Any work that has meaning, that can be a blessing to people and to the earth, can be a calling". Do you believe this to be true? If so, have you seen examples of people who demonstrate their work as a "calling" that could be a positive witness for others? Please share examples.



7. page 237-- "People are given more than they can handle all the time!. . .but. . .you will never be place in a situation that God can't handle!" The paragraph surrounding these quotes really grabbed my attention for I hear the cliche all the time- "God will never give me more than I can handle!"



I would just love to hear your reactions to this notion.

Comments on Chapters 15-18 (Part 5- Deepening My Relationships)

Comments on Chapters 15-18 (Part 5- Deepening My Relationships)


from John Ortberg's The Me I Want to Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You



1. Chapter 15 speaks about inviting Jesus into our personal "holy of holies"- the space in our soul where no one else has access. Speaking of prayer, can you relate to Ortberg's frustration at not being able to be fully present when praying (ie.- being so easily distracted). Comment on his prayer coach's advice, who said to John, "simply invite Jesus to come with you". An example of this is when John invited Jesus to run with him- his conversation with the Lord started to happen naturally.





2. Invitations are important. What to you think of invitations that begin with "negativity"? See Ortberg's comment on p. 177- "any piece of paper (DAS adds 'email also') that causes distress can be an invitation to prayer, a candidate to be spread out before the Lord." Note also that "mind wanderings" may actually be an invitation to prayer as well. Have you ever seen "mind wandering" as authentic prayer prelude?



3. God uses other people to form people. God is at work in your life through other people if you open up your eyes to take notice. Take the connectedness survey at the end of this chapter (page 193). are there any insights that emerged from taking this survey; ("aha moments" or moments of thanksgiving). I would suggest taking some time to pray about the answers/insights from that survey.



4. One of the great sins of the church is that we often have a hard time being honest about human sin. It's almost as if we have to be 'cleaned up' before we arrive for some reason. Chapter 17 reminds us of the need to be 'human' and that sometimes the change we need in life will involve genuine confession of our flaws. we are often afraid of that because we are afraid of looking bad.



My favorite part of this chapter was the reality that in scripture people were not put on pedestals. Even those we consider 'great' or 'pillars' were painted with flaws. Examples were shown of serious flaws where these pillars took great steps backward in their faith (consider peter denying Jesus or stepping out in the boat) which Ortberg described as the "J curve" (page 200). The step backward is sometimes necessary in order to eventually move forward in our faith. Please comment on the section "recognize the J curve".



Have you experience the J curve in your life?



5. Chapter 18 is a difficult chapter in many ways- or at least it is for me. In this chapter, Ortberg remarks that difficult people in our lives may actually reveal how God can use them to help us become the people God is calling us to be. We may see them as roadblocks, brain drains, depressing and scary, and people who fuel our anger-- but. . ..if we can open our eyes they may teach us a great deal! What do you think of the comments from Ortberg "if God wants to grow some quality in you, he may send you a person who tempts you to behave in just the opposite way. If you need to develop love, then some unlovable people will be your greatest challenge. If you need to develop hope, maintaining it in the face of discouragers will make it strong. If you want to grow in your ability to confront a hard-to-confront intimidateor will give you serious practice." Please comment.



Also- is it humbling to admit that "we personaly may be the difficult person he is sending to shape somebody else"?

New Post Slated for Monday, August 2

I hope you've had time to catch up on some reading.  I plan to post comments on the next section tommorow, Monday August 2.  I was away this past week with limited access to email. 

Pastor Dave

Comments on Chapters 11-14 from Pastor Dave

Comments on Chapters 11-14


from John Ortberg's The Me I Want to Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You



1. Ortberg writes- "we pray more than we know" and then goes on to cite numerous examples of how this happens. He also quotes Richard Foster who says 'countless people have such a "stained glass image" of prayer that they fail to recognize what they are experiencing as prayer and so condemn themselves for not praying.'" (chapter 11)



Respond to these thoughts or other thoughts from chapter 11 that struck you.



(I can personally relate to the idea of praying a lot without the stereotypical "fold your hands, bow your head type praying". Much prayer that I do I become conscious of in retrospect- "yes, when I was thinking about "this or that" I was indeed praying.")



2. Is the image of the brook trout helpful for you-- see fly, want fly, eat fly (result- enslaved)? Ortberg says "temptation promises freedom but really makes us a slave. (chapter 12)



3. "If I walk down this road, where will it lead in the long run- toward or away from the me I want to be? Would this be a helfpul question for you to ask? Would it make a difference? Or is more helpful to ask- "if I do this will the 'idiot lights' on my spiritual dashboard go off (see p.141) (chapter 12)



4. Chapter 13 states "tell me your gifts and I'll tell you your sins" . It then lifts up the Enneagram tool which helps define 9 patterns in people which one will naturally describe us "better than others." Within each pattern is a strength but also a possible weakness within that pattern. The 9 patterns are:

Reformer, Server, Achiever, Artist, Thinker, Loyalist, Enthusiast, Commander, Peacemaker

As I read it, I was drawn to the description of achiever which seems to me how I am wired. I read the description of the blessings as well as the blind spots and it seems to fit so well. How about you? Which pattern seems to fit? Does the blind spots make sense as well?





5. When we find ourself out of the flow (chapter 14), Ortberg reminds us the the bible often uses the metaphor of "putting on clothing". At same time, he reminds us that we have to "take off" other things. In this chapter, one of the things he suggest we take off is "RAGS" which stands for

RESENTMENT

ANXIETY

GREED

SUPERIORITY



Obviously, we need to focus on taking off all those things. Which part of the RAGS acronymn is harder for you to "take off"?



6. Has anyone taken the MONVEE free online assesment that comes with the book? What did you learn from that experience?





NOTE- I know that some have felt uncomfortable posting. Feel free to comment anonymously if you wish or if you'd rather make comments to me via email, send them to pastordave@goserve.net. Realize that all feedback you provide helps teach me how to do things better in the future. I appreciate you being involved and reading book with me.

Discussion Starters for Chapters 7-10

Discussion Starters for Chapters 7-10

Chapter 7—LET YOUR DESIRES LEAD YOU TO GOD




1) Ortberg speaks about how God made us with desires—Material, Achievement, Relational, and physical desires and there is a definite pattern to your desires. Do you see a definite pattern to your desires? Share if willing.

Chapter 8—THINK GREAT THOUGHTS

2) I love Ortberg’s skunk under the house story. He puts it clearly- “you cannot get rid of the skunk odor without getting rid of the skunk.” It is a great metaphor for thinking about this chapter. He writes “our feelings never descend on us at random. As a general rule, our emotions flow out of our thoughts.” Agree or disagree with this statement?



3) Reflect and comment on the statement- “the way we live will inevitably be a reflection of the way we think. True change always begins in the mind.”



4) The spiritual life is about paying attention to our thoughts. Ortberg says we need to remember to “monitor the mind”- take any thought and ask, “what direction do those thoughts lead me in? Are they leading me toward life- toward God’s best version of me or in another direction?



Do you find that simple question helpful? Are there other questions you can think of that would help “monitor” your thoughts?



Do you believe its possible for you, personally, to adjust thoughts that are not leading to life as Ortberg suggests?





Chapter 9—FEED YOUR MIND WITH EXCELLENCE



5) How are you feeding your “mind” right now? From your experience, what has helped “feed your mind so that it flourishes”?





CHAPTER 10- NEVER WORRY ALONE

6) Ortberg reminds us that we are not meant to worry alone. Have you ever had someone who was a “non-anxious presence” for you? (in the past? Current?) How did that help you on your journey?

Looking ahead- next week I will post discussion starters for part 4 of the book (chapters 11-14)

Discussion Starters for Chapters, 4, 5, and 6

Comments on Chapters 4, 5, and 6


from John Ortberg's The Me I Want to Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You

*Keep up the good comments.  Each of you is bringing out some great points along the way.

1. I really liked chapter 4. It began with the story of how King Saul tried to give the Shepherd, David, his armor. It absolutely was not the right fit. "The bible does not say you are God's appliance; it says you are his masterpiece. Appliances get mass-produced. Masterpieces get handcrafted." How often do you celebrate your uniqueness?

2. Spiritual growth is hand-crafted, not mass-produced. god does not do "one-size-fits-all". Comment on that statement.

Pastor Dave comments---This is a key reality that churches need to accept, embrace, honor, and lift up. what is also means is more work as we can't simply provide programs, preach sermons, teach in such a way that assumes all are the same. If anything, accepting this reality will be a major blessing and spark for the church's ministry.



3. Here is Ortberg's "alternate question" that he feels we should be asking more often----"What do you do that makes you feel fully alive?" (remember his comments that sustainable spiritual growth can't lat if it is built purely on 'should')



4. In the section starting on page 53 (called "What is My Pathway?), Gary Thomas lifts up several sacred pathways. He says that we will "often recognize our preferred pathways because we find ourselves being changed or making key decisions when we are doing a particcular activity." He lists these on page 55:

Naturalist

Ascetic

Traditionalist

Actvivist

Caregiver

Sensate

Enthusiast

Contemplative

Intellectual



Share with the group what you identify as your top 2. The follow up is simple-- are we spending enough time exploring these pathways?



5. Chapter 5 speaks about the importance of learning to surrender- not just once but as a continual experience. "Surrender means that I will seek to handle the problem facing me in a way that honors God. the options that look attractive to me-avoiding, evading, gossiping, blasting- I relinquish to God?"



Is that a helpful statement for you? In the complexities of life and the many situations we encounter would the simple question- "am I honoring God in this situation?" help you.



6. One who listens to music can't help but recall Carrie Underwood's song- "Jesus take the wheel". Although some Christians may not like the simple metaphor of Jesus in driver's seat, Underwood has captured the concept of "surrender" as has Ortberg. If not familiar, google the song. What do you think of the metaphor of "letting Jesus take the wheel"?



7. Chapter 6 is a brief chapter. It challenges us who believe that the harder you try at anything, the more success you will have. Ortberg title this chapter, "try softer". Share the aspects of this chapter that stood out for you.

(for me, I highlighted and underlined the following quote- 'rarely does anyone seek help for their pride problem. There are no Betty Ford Treatment Centers for the Insufferably Arrogant, but not because we don't need them'.)





8.Final Note--- Please share any insights/ comments from any of these chapters that you would like to mention. (There is a great supply of quotes and insights that any of us could spend time thinking about but I have not commented on)





Looking ahead-- next 10 days (7/4- 7/14), comments will be based on Part 3 (chapters 7-10)

Discussion Starters for Chapter 3- "Discover the Flow"

Comments on Chapter 3-- "Discover the Flow"

from John Ortberg's The Me I Want to Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You

Note---***Week of June 27, I will post comments on Part 2 of the book which is chapters 3-6 (pages 35--78)-- I will post separate comments for each chapter throughout the week. ***

I hope things are going well and you are enjoying the book. The cool thing about a book is that you need not agree with every comment. Often the comments that you find challenging present the best discussion starters.



Here are some comments that will hopefully spark some conversation today.







1) Ortberg writes- "My main job is to remain connected to God. When my primary focus is being present with him, everything else has a way of falling into place."- page 35

*I would like to get your reactions to this statement. Do you agree or disagree? I intellectually agree with that but I wonder if that is received as far too simplistic, idealistic, and perhaps even unhelpful for some? Does it produce a sense of guilt that if things are not going well, it's all our fault?







2) Ortberg speaks of a "bridge of grace" that helps close the gap between the current "me" and the sanctified me (the me we are meant to be) . H



3) Foundational Idea of Book--"The only way to become the person God made you to be is to live with the Spirit of God flowing through you like living water." -- page 39. Perhaps its because I'm gardening a lot and using a watering can, I often think of myself as that watering can. A watering can by itself is mere decoration. It has little value as decoration but takes on great potential when a supply of water fills its interior. It moves beyond potential when the filled can is tipped and what is inside is poured out. Life is about returning to God often to be filled up. I think of the images Ortberg points out and many others in scripture which speak of the unlimited wells, life giving water that continually flows, the roaring rivers, etc that come from God to fill up his people. How do you turn to God to be filled up? Are in the flow right now is your watering can a bit dry?



4) Two great soul searching quotes from Ortberg-- page 40

"When someone bumps into me, what spills out of me reveals what's inside of me."



"When we are in the flow of the Spirit, we become increasingly full of the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodnes, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control."



Answer for yourself how full of the spirit you are at the moment? What fruits of the spirit appear to be underdeveloped in your life at the moment?





5) React to the following on page 42- " a trees job is not to try and bear fruit. The trees job is to abide near the river. . . .the fruit does not ripen overnite."



As we compare this quote to #4 it appears to remind us once more that our focus needs to be on putting ourselves in places to be nourished and fed by God. As one who has planted a garden this year for the first time, I see that watering is a daily discipline. I water over and over and over again and it takes a long time for the vegetables to reach maturity. . . .but, I keep at it just as God keeps working in our lives, trying to get through.



6) What are ways in which you "open yourself" to the spirits influence in your life?

What are ways in which you "close yourself off to the spirit's influence in your life?" (a.k.a "quenching the spirit"-- see page 44)





7) GPS image closes the chapter. Do you believe that God is ready to guide you home? Is the GPS in your life unplugged, plugged in and listening, in need of "u-turn", or plugged in once more and ready for new directions?

Chapter 2 Discussion Starters--"The Me I Don't Want to Be"

CHAPTER 2 DISCUSSION-- "THE ME I DON'T WANT TO BE"




Pastor Dave Commments--

Note 1-

Chapter 2 begins with a very compelling story. I am drawn to it because it references my favorite author of all time- Henri Nouwen. (you might check out the web site dedicated to nouwen, www.nouwen.net.

Nowen became an academic star quickly-- teaching at Notre Dame, Yale, and then Harvard. His books quickly became best sellers and he was a sought after speaker. But, he was restless beyond belief never feeling authenic, never feeling at home. This gifted leader, a man who was gifted in using words (spoken and written) didn't find the best version of himself until he was asked to minister in a community of severely handicapped people-- L'Arche in Toronto, Canada. Many who lived there could not understand his words or his writings. Henri had to learn to communicate in new ways- by actions of love and compassion and tangible care. It was there (at L'Arche) that some of his most profound writings emerged as one sensed that something profound was happening in his life- ironically after he left the spotlight of high profile and prestigious universities. Many thought he was crazy but Nouwen was continually exposed to people like Trevor (pages 22 and 23), who "lived out the best version of himself"



How would you have reacted to someone like Trevor coming in and offering that toast? Would you have joined in the singing of "If you're happy and you know it, raise your glass? Would it inspire you or would you just be playing along?





2) page 25 quotes-

"Comparison kills spiritual growth". . ..

"Spiritual greatness has nothing to do with being greater than others. It has everything to do with being as great as each of us can be. "

"Each of us has a me that we think we should be, which is at odds with the me that God made us to be."



I would invite you to comment on these quotes as I think your comments will benefit the group.



3. FTT- Failure to thrive. This was an interesting concept. "Psychologists have begun to speak of what is perhaps the largest mental health problem today. It is not depression or anxiety, at least not at clinical levels. It is languishing-- a failure to thrive. . . . .It is weariness of soul and inability to delight in life".




That being said, do you agree with Orberg's notion that for each of us, "there is a person inside of you waiting to come alive."?


If you are (or someone you know) is in that FTT state- what kind of help do you need/ or can give?


Can you think of stories/ movies where someone is languishing and been helped by a catalyst (helped to thrive)? What "take home' lessons can you glean from that story?






4. Here is where it boils down for me-- "God designed you to flourish 'so that' you could be part of his redemptive project in ways that you otherwise could not."

What that says to me is that when we become the best verison of ourselves-- God can really use us in helping the world around us. therefore, much is at stake!





5. Open ended-- please share any insights/ comments/ quotes that you feel would benefit the group from chapter 2.

Chapter 2 Discussion will be posted Friday June 25

I hope you are enjoying the book, The Me I Want to Be.  If you haven't commented or read the comments on chapter one, I would encourage you to check them out.

Tommorow, Friday, June 25 I will start the posts for chapter 2 and invite your input on that next part of the book. 

blessings

Pastor Dave

Comments on Chapter One and Your Feedback

Tuesday, June 22- Discussing Chapter One of "The Me I Want to Be " by John Ortberg

*I would encourage you to take some notes as you go through the book and perhaps underline key passages along the way.  each chapter has some good personal questions to ponder.  I hope that on your own you will answer Ortberg's question on page 21-- "how is your spiritual life going?" 


*For today (and next few days as we get into this study) and for our discussion purposes let me throw out some things you might share or comment on:

1. Share with the group your favorite statement(s)/comment from chapter 1.  (What "hits" us often reveals a lot about ourselves)

2. Do you need someone to "ring your bell" as John's wife Nancy did? (see page 11-12 when she shared her list of things John could do better) 

3. Have you ever made the excuse "I'm doing the best I can" but deep down realizing you're actually not "doing the best you can"?

4. Comment on the following quote- "God made you to flourish but flourishing never happens by looking out for 'number one'."  It is tied to a grander nobler vision" (page 13)

5. Ortberg tells the story of the enthusiastic airport shuttle bus driver, who just radiated joy and enthusiasm as he went about his work and created a "community of joy".  (page 13 and 14).  Share with the group an example of someone you see "flourishing".  As Ortberg illustrates, flourishing lives can be found anywhere.



***That's enough to get us going.  Feel free to comment on one or comment on multiple questions.  Anything you share will be a gift.  Participate as you are able. 

Dear God, thank you for all those who are taking part in this discussion.  Help us all to become the people you are calling us to be.  Help our lives to flourish so that we might become the best version of who you created us to be.  Amen

Welcome and Readings for Week 1 (Week of June 21)

Welcome everyone to our discussion of John Ortberg's, "The Me I Want to Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You".

I know that many of you could easily plow through this whole book in several hours.  I suggest we take it in smaller chapters over the course of the next 6 weeks.  For this week, read chapters 1 and 2 which are called "Learn Why God Made You" and "The Me I Don't Want to be".  That second chapter's title should grab many of us for there are certainly things inside each of us which we wish we could get rid of - attitudes, actions, regrets, fears, failurse, etc.

I am looking forward to this experience-  I look forward to posting but also to reading your posts as well.

For today, you might introduce yourself to the group if you are comfortable doing that.  (In any way you wish).  Note that you many feel free to participate and post comments "anonmymously" on this site. 

Tommorow I will make some comments and ask some questions on chapter 1. 

Pastor Dave Sonnenberg

Test for the Book Discussion Group

I am looking forward to the beginning of the book discussion of "The Me I Want to Be".  I will make the first post next Monday, June 21.  Hang tight for now.

Please note that since some who are interested in participating are not on Facebook, I have created this blog site to post my comments- gsbookgroup.blogspot.com.  If you are not on facebook, you can post your comments on this site.  If you prefer to comment on the facebook page for this discussion, all my posts will automatically be imported there as well.

All that being said, you can participate in this book discussion on this site www.gsbookgroup.blogspot.com 

or

you can participate on the Facebook Page-- The Me I Want to Be Facebook Book Discussion Page

Pastor Dave Sonnenberg

P.s - if you have any questions, please contact me at pastordave@goserve.net